Tripe from Waitrose

I enjoy shopping in Waitrose.

I can be seen at least once a week in the Balham branch meandering about with my shopping trolley (£7.99 from Lidl), following the siren call of the price gun as it announces where the discounts are. I've had some fab bargains, including a half price fruit loaf from Poilane, the fancy French bakers. The full price is £3.60 for something the size of a malt loaf. My children said they preferred the much larger fruit loaf from Lidl at only 40p as it only had sultanas in it and not all this other rubbish fruit. That's me told, then.

The customers are the sort who do not leave their staffies tied up outside, if you get my drift. Many of the ladies - for it's mostly ladies - are of the yummy mummy variety.

I like reading the Waitrose magazine. There are usually a few good recipes. Anything with less than five ingredients is OK by me. Occasionally the family even eat the stuff.

Unfortunately my love affair with Waitrose is in a bit of a turmoil at the moment. In its latest edition, there is an article by a house husband called Sam Holden who claims the following:

"Although I was a stranger to the kitchen, I soon found that preparing exciting, top-quality dishes was neither particularly time-consuming nor difficult, and within a few months I found my abilities easily surpassed those of every woman I know, even the ones who thought they were good cooks." "As well as being incapable of experimenting, women are useless at following written instructions. Blinded by numbers and symbols, they add the wrong amount of sugar or salt - or substitute one for the other." He also says that women don't actually like food and consider it to be just fuel, and that men are more greedy. He even has the gall to end the article with the usual "name three women who have a Michelin star".

Is it not biting the hand that pays for the stuff in your shop that it feeds itself with to criticise these lovely yummy mummies (and us yucky mummies) in such a crass manner?

Here is my email to the editor:

Dear William Sitwell

I had been enjoying reading the November 2007 edition of Waitrose Food Illustrated until I reached Sam Holden's article.

I can quite appreciate that some women can cook and some men can cook. Can't we leave it at that?

Cooking for a family and cooking in a restaurant are two completely different things. I should know - my father owned the Como Lario restaurant for many years. He never cooked at home, which was a Good Thing as he left the place in such a mess. Mother was in charge at home and made her feelings quite clear about his 'helpful suggestions'. Now he has got used to working in a domestic environment, of course we get fabulous meals. The hang over from running a restaurant is that he still can't get the hang of just cooking for two. My brother and I get some interesting food parcels!

I read your magazine to get ideas as I find cooking to be complete drudgery. Whenever I have a meal cooked for me now, I don't care what it is as long as I haven't had to cook it.

These battle of the sexes type articles are just lazy and tedious. Get some more writers if this is the best you can come up with. I'm only grateful that I didn't have to pay for the magazine, thanks to my JL card.

Looking forward to a better read next time.

I did have a reply, thanking me for my contribution. No mention was made of a hamper for my hurt feelings.

If you want to see the full article, I suggest you go to Waitrose now. They have plenty of them lying around. It's the one with the toffee apples on the front.

All the rage - November 2007

So here it is, the November 2007 edition of the fabulous All The Rage.

This month's theme is Mysteries and Puzzles.

I'm in there somewhere, along with lots of other people, so have a good read:

http://alltherage.org.uk/alltherage-2007-11.pdf

Dream Dream Dream

I suppose my dreams are about the same as everyone else's, full of the flotsam and jetsam of everyday life.

Two recent dreams have slightly puzzled me.

Number One

My pedometer sometimes falls off its clip - I think it's trying to run off to someone thinner and more athletic.

I dreamed that I had looked down to see that I had lost the pedometer. I thought to myself that it was only a matter of time and I'd just have to get another one.

That was it, really.

Number Two

I dreamed I was going to some sort of exhibition with my mother in law. There was nothing about what the exhibition was about, but it seemed to interest lots of other old ladies who were sitting in the lounge area at the entrance. MIL starts to berate a lady about putting her handbag on a table and I'm so embarassed I sit behind her with a tablecloth on my head, much to the sympathy and amusement of the ladies who can see me.


Oh, there was a third where I had to go to someone's wedding in an Italian sort of place near Rome that I didn't know and the people there thought my clothes weren't nice enough so took me around to find nicer ones. I think a hat was involved too.

It's the ones closest to real life that puzzle me the most.

GW convention revisited

Oh, oooo toooobe is a marvellous thing. It also saves you lots of dosh. Instead of having to use up my xmas and birthday gift allocation, I can just view the extra bits on the Definitive GW box set that some kindly soul has posted up for us.

So for those of you who thought the convention was some sort of mass hysteria type thing, here goes:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K1ftOEoB1RY

I'm not actually in it, but my contribution to the furlong of bras can be seen at 3mins 10 secs into the segment. That's fame enough for me.

It was a happy happy day. I found a free parking space nearby, and the day just continued to get better and better. Oh, and I was on the quiz winning team.

Sunday in the Park

I've just come back from a long walk around Tooting Bec Common, my local stomping ground.

Dressed in my power walking gear - sensible zip pocket trakkie bottoms from Debenhams, my top from the day before, and my freebie MBTs (which replaced the previous pair I completely trashed by walking in them) - I ran away from my house for over an hour, and came back carrying a couple of red onions as I stopped at the greengrocers on the way home.

The peodmeter says 8231. Add on my trip to the supermarket this morning, this means I have done my 10,000 steps.
If I'm not careful, I'll get my pedometer addiciton again. Last year I would keep a note of my daily steps, and would spend evenings stomping around the house so that I would make the 10,000 before going to bed. No wonder the MBTs wore out.

http://www.swissmasai.co.uk/Default.aspx?lang=en-GB

Have a look at these shoes for yourself. I think they're fabulous. Ok, they look ridiculous, but I like them.

Anyway, back to the Common. It's such a lovely day today and I just had to get out there. The park was busy with families, dogs, and all sorts. I stomped around, listening to my husband's little radio. It's really a great way to spend the afternoon, listening to the radio, watching all the people, and hugging my favourite oak tree - obviously whilst no-one was looking!

Now I'll get the house to myself as they all go off to see Granny. Bliss. Pity I'll spend the time doing my admin work, and get the dinner ready. Perhaps I'll just do some yoga instead........

A Glimmer of Hope?

I was going to call this post 'Who am I kidding' but decided that it was time, after all this time, to be more positive.
For the past four weeks I have been taking part in a walking body blitz. This has involved pounding the paths of South London commons and getting intimate with a resistance band in the privacy of my own bedroom - the children nearly made themselves sick laughing at me, so I had to hide myself away.
Alas, the feeding frenzies have continued, so I am not the shadow of my former self that I'd hoped for. As usual, it's all my fault and I have no-one else to blame.
Have there been any benefits? Well, I have been out walking at least three times a week with a gang of determined ladies in their MBTs. Well, I'd better clarify that, I scuttle after a bunch of fit toned women who are all at least 4 dress sizes smaller than me. That would be a far more realistic description.
Anyway, it's been a good laugh, and even getting lost in Richmond Park, surrounded by vicious looking deer, wasn't such a bad experience.

I could now go on and write about my weight loss hell, but it's all too dull, and even I'm bored witless. Want to get thin? Stop stuffing your face and move about more. There, end of story, now get on with something more interesting.

My angel card for today is Power. Hmm. Very interesting. Certainly could do with some!
Try it for yourselves: http://www.innerlinks.com/index.php

All the Rage - October - Fantasy and Adventure

She's done it again - Leila's put together another fantastic edition of All The Rage.

And I'm in it - again! She's very kind, including my stuff.

So give it a read:

http://www.alltherage.org.uk/alltherage-2007-10.pdf